Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Screaming Man

There are a lot of really interesting people around these parts. Really, there are interesting people around all parts, some are easier to spot than others though... but that's because some stand out more than others do. Take for example Screaming Man. He's an easy one to spot (or hear). He's out at least once a week, right at lunch time, and sometimes he makes a reappearance a second time in the week. Mostly he comes and screams at people on Tuesdays. I like to think he has a rotation of locations he visits. This is what he does: stands, in the middle of the little shopping square and screams at people, but no one in particular.

He screams about how the world is going to end, about how he is a great Christian and everyone he knows can tell because he does good things and goes and screams at people every Tuesday (he didn't say that exactly... but pretty much that's what he meant). He screams and shouts about how you are going to die, and you should figure out where you are going. That hell is a horrible terrible place. And he knows he isn't going to hell because he screams at people and has even set up a rotation of locations. o. good. gracious. He rambles on and on and on... and no one listens to him.

So, one Tuesday afternoon, as the hubs and I were walking past him, I stopped, looked at him, and listened. He stopped talking though. He realized I was actually listening to him and his words stared to mumble and fumble, stutter and sputter. I waited.tap, tap, tapping my foot, hands folded across my tummy. Mutter and shutter... words spilling out on the other, little short breaths... nothing that made sense at all. I tilted my head, tap tap tapped my foot quicker and louder, I was growing impatient, I wanted to hear what he had to say. Finally, after ten minutes of being tongue tied, he started up again. Repeating the exact same thing he had said before I started to pay attention. Well, shoot. I had already heard that. I wanted to hear something new. No such luck.

Apparently he doesn't expect people to listen to him. Apparently he doesn't like it when people give him the time of day and actually stop and pay attention. Apparently he just wants to be Screaming Man who every one ignores. Apparently he just really really enjoys screaming. Well... on Tuesday, if you are bored or looking for something to do and want to have your ears go numb, you should go sit in the square and listen to Screaming Man who will most likely freeze and go dumb the moment you sit to listen to him. Free entertainment, I tell you.

It's really rather quite amusing. I was secretly pleased that I made Screaming Man stop and stumble over his words. Yes. Yes, I was. After standing and waiting to listen to what Screaming Man had to say exactly, I scurried to catch up with the hubs (because of course he had kept on walking) and I told him, "It was me. I made him stop. I looked at him to listen, and he shut up."

"Haha," the hubs chuckled and smiled. And we kept walking.

Today I heard Screaming Man again. He says the exact same thing over and over again. It continues to range from Religion to Politics. ...interesting. Possibly. Entertaining. Yes. But you have to remember: if you really want to listen to him you have to pretend to be doing something so that it looks like you are not paying attention.

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