Wednesday, October 13, 2010


I have secret powers. It's true. I do. I know no one would ever believe me in the whole wide world, but I do. I've thought long and hard about wether or not I should share my powers with you and I decided I might. Well, I decided that I would, I mean, That is after all what this post is about. So, I suppose now it's just inevitable. My secret is out.

Ok. So, are you ready for this? I mean, it's pretty wild and crazy. It's a pretty amazing super power actually. Brace yourselves: I find money. Not like to take from someone's wallet or anything like that. I mean, when I'm walking around and about, I see money on the ground. I have special radar. Some of the times it has Obviously been walked over countless times, or driven over, or rained on (and maybe some other slightly disgustingness done to it). But I don't care. It's money. A lot of the time I will see a penny just laying on the ground. It has been deserted, left alone, abandoned. I hate to see such pure abandonment, so naturally, I pick it up. Yup. I find nickels and dimes and quarters too. So true. I do. Pretty much every time I go out somewhere (to the store, on a walk) I will come back a richer lady because I found a quarter or a penny. This is how I make my living. I don't think I've told you this yet, but it's true. Finding money on the street and in shops is the way I bring home the bacon. Surprised? You really shouldn't be. I mean, if you think about it I'm sure you might see a penny on the ground occasionally. Do you stop to pick it up? I'm gonna say that most people don't, which is why I find so many of them. Which is how I am able to make my living off of finding monies on the ground.

The hubs always teases me about picking up my monies. I don't care. I tell him, "I'm richer than you are right now," which is kind of true ... I mean, I did just pick up a coin or two and he didn't. It's crazy. This summer when I was walking and biking all over town I became a billionaire. I really don't like to brag about my income, I really don't even like to share the way I make my living because I don't want to go out and not find any more monies. That's why I've debated so long in my head about this. The hubs reassured me I would still find my income. Anyhow. I was telling you about this summer. I think I found at least $5 a day on average. True. I told you have special super powers. One day the hubs and I were at the Farmer's Market and were at a booth tasting some plumes. yum yum yum. As I am always aware of what is on the ground around me I spotted it. the same time the hubs did. green money. The hubs reached down and picked it up. $10. bam a ram. The hubs likes to take credit for being the sole finder of the $10 just because he is the one that picked it up. I always politely and sweetly disagree with. But I figured, I'd let him have this one since I find about that much in copper on a daily basis. And also, I am pretty proud of him, for being so inexperienced at finding bacon on the street, he did a pretty great job spotting that.

By now the hubs knows that when I lag a few steps behind it isn't because I've been gazing in a shop window or been hit by a bus, it's because I spotted a money and stopped to pick it up. yup yup. It's my radar. My secret power radar. I'm so happy I have it.

Though, the hubs is also a little bit worried about me. He says I'd be an easy one to trick, all you'd have to do is leave a little trail of pennies and I'm as good as gone. eh... what can I say? It's true. It happened this summer. I was walking around and I spotted a penny. I picked it up and as I did I saw another one right close to it. Then another one and another one! What a find!!! I was so very thrilled! Then a man that saw me pick up the pennies said to me, "A penny saved is a penny earned. It must be your lucky day!" and laughed a little laugh. I just smiled brightly back at him. If I would have known at the time I picked those pennies up that he was homeless I might have given them to him, but I didn't know, so I kept them and they added to my loot that day.

Last Monday the hubs and I went out for a hott anniversary date. After dinner we walked around the mall (cause that's where we went for dinner) and you know, were just strolling along. As we were walking past Bath & Body Works (I remember o so well) I made the spotting of the week! Green. I stopped, bent down, and came back up with a green dollar between my fingers! O wow! What a night! What a find! How terribly exciting! o yes, o yes, o yes!!! The hubs looked back at me (he had kept walking and stopped when he noticed I was no longer next to him) with a smile on his face. "What'd ya find this time?"

"A dollar!!" I beam, holding the dollar up in front of his face so he can get a really good look like he'd never seen one in his life before.

"Good one! I didn't even see that." And here's the truth, I wouldn't have minded if he had seen it, but secretly I'm glad he didn't. And the other part of the truth is, while I'm amazed and utterly shocked that hundreds of people walked right past and over and on that little green bill, they didn't see it and if they did see it, they didn't stop to get it. Why would you not stop for green money? Why would you not stop for shinny money? I mean really? It's too easy! All you have to do is stoop down a little and pick it up, and you are instantly richer! I should write a book on how to get rich quick. I know how. ... except, if everyone did that there would be none for the other people, namely me. And truthfully, I really don't want to share my monies with you. Sorry. But, this is my income we're talking about here. So, if you do see any monies laying on the ground and you live in my town, do NOT stop to pick it up. Otherwise I quite strongly encourage you do to so. Unless of course I am visiting you and we are taking a walk together. Then don't pick it up. That could be very bad. Very, very bad. But if I'm not there, you will be instantly richer! And who couldn't use a little extra moolah these days, huh?

You know what really kills me? Those fountains. The ones by the shops. The ones where people purposefully throw their money into. I would LOVE to clean one of those fountain pools dry. of coins, not water. I wouldn't even mind if the water were in the fountain pool, just so long as I could get the pennies. O, that would be a dream come true! Think of all the shinny pennies in there! wow. ...maybe one day, you never do know.

and now I just sound a little obsessed. I'm not. really. I promise. I just get excited thinking about all of the times I found pennies and about the possibilities that lie ahead.

0 comment(s):