Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Monday

*note: I wrote most of this yesterday but didn't get to finish or post it, a little Gooseberry needed me :)*

Things have been kind of rough around these parts since last night. Really last night was no different than most. Emerson slept for a few hours and then he woke up, slept, woke up... you get the idea. It's a nice little pattern he has going. If only there was a schedule to it... it's safe to say he was awake more than I thought necessary :)

This morning he had his one month check up. He has grown and weighs a whole 7.7 lbs now. What a big boy. He also got a shot, poor little guy. He doesn't like being pricked. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately?) the doctor made a discovery while we were there. Emerson looked jaundiced. So they pricked his little foot and took some blood. They found out he was a 13. Higher than it should be, higher than the doctor liked, and higher than I wanted to hear. Apparently it is breast milk jaundice. I don't really know if I buy it. But, he is a doctor so of course I'm going to listen to what he has to say. I just really hate what he had to say. The doctor said I would have to stop nursing for 48 hours and give Emerson formula instead. Then we would go back to the doctor on Wednesday to have his levels checked again.

I HATE that we have to do this. Even though there are challenges with nursing I would much rather face those than give my baby formula. Not that there is anything wrong with giving your baby formula, I know a lot of moms do and the babies are healthy and happy. It's just not what I want for my baby, not even for 48 hours. It is killing me. It is also a mess. When Emerson takes the bottle only about half of it seems to get in his belly, the other half ends up on a burp cloth while he's eating, or is spit up after he finishes eating. He really doesn't spit up much at all. I cannot wait until we go back to the doctor. I just pray his levels go down, a lot, and that we can stop this nonsense. Although, even if the doctor says to keep him on formula for another day or so, I would fight it and just not listen. It's horrible. I just hate being in this situation. So if you think of it, could you say a little prayer for Emerson and me for that matter? I'm not handling this so well.



6 comment(s):

Day By Day said...

Hannah I am so sorry! I can imagine how difficult and stressful this is! And to only want to best nutrition for your baby and then to be told that breast milk might not be the best - I imagine that is incredibly frustrating! I'll be praying for you and baby Emerson!

Heather said...

Hannah, so sorry to hear of this trouble. I so understand the heartache of having to give formula instead. The first time I was forced to do it I was sobbing as soon as I mixed it. Jon had to feed it to Kaia-I couldn't bring myself to do it. Just know that other moms have felt the tension too. We'll pray that you get good news and can return to breastmilk soon!

Anonymous said...

idiot doctor. you need a doctor who believes that God's ways are best. Doctor's push formula because they get kickbacks from the manufacturers of formula. Babies need mom's milk and making the little babies adjust to unnatural products puts the babies and moms through a lot of needless pain. I'll be praying that you get a better doctor.

Callie Nicole said...

That's a tough situation Hannah, praying for you and Emerson!

Hanna Saera said...

I had to look up jaundice in the dictionary first :-) only to find out that Noud has had the same in the first week after his birth. He also arrived three weeks early. What I was told is that it's common with 'premature' babies. Noud was put under a lamp at the hospital for 24 hrs and his levels improved instantly. I have never heard it could be caused by breastmilk, so like you I'm not sure I buy it. Fortunately I could continue breastfeeding him and I feel for you that you have been told to do otherwise. I hope he recovers soon enough so you can give him the best formula created by Our Creator. Hang in there Hannah! Trust your maternal instinct God has given you :-)

Heidi said...

Kelly Mom is a trusted breastfeeding website. I would read up on what they have to say on Jaundice. I've never heard of it being caused by breastfeeding. Nolan had it when he was born, and the answer they gave me was to breastfeed more... http://kellymom.com/health/baby-health/bfhelp-jaundice/